Dads don’t do playdates

At-home dad Evan Smith Rakoff, a writer who lives with his wife, Joanna, on the Lower East Side, doesn’t belong to any playgroups. Instead he prefers taking his three-year-old son, Coleman, to the heliport on South Street to watch the choppers take off over the East River. “I don’t know if it’s just me or men in general,” says Smith Rakoff, “but while I’m friendly on the street when I see neighborhood moms and dads with their kids, I never make plans. We just go off and do stuff together. Some days I’ll leave the house with Coleman and have no idea where we’ll go.”

John Casey of the West Village, a freelance writer and contractor who has been at home with his three girls, ages 7, 5 and 2, for six years, says he thinks playgroups “just don’t compute” for most city fathers. “I was always more comfortable going out and doing something than sitting around and talking,” says Casey. “That’s probably more of a women’s thing than a guy thing.”